May 25, 2013

As Time Goes By



Maybe I should have called this post "Same Time, Next Year".  Today is my 45th birthday.  I cannot believe it's been a year since I've posted. Things are always happening, time rushes by.   I have ideas for posts, but end up tweeting them instead of writing this blog.

So much has happened in the past year.  I was living at the beach in San Francisco with roommates.  We had a great apartment with amazing views.  I had a beautiful pink bedroom.  Now things have changed.  I'm currently in Berkeley, just across the Bay.  It's temporary while I look for my own apartment in the City.  There are lots of stories in between, which I will share as individual posts to fill you in as time goes by.

It seems that I'm always looking for an apartment, doesn't it?  How many times have I written posts about my dream apartment?  I guess I'm still on the hunt, but I think the problem lies within me.

I'm frequently full of what-if's, and then those things seem to come to pass.  My what-if's are negative in nature.  I have worries, as we all do.  However worrying is praying for what you don't want and I've come to realize that I might be living proof of this.  Yes I have had many positive things happen to me for which I am grateful, but I wonder where I'd be if I got rid of the negative what-if's.  (I guess that makes that a positive what-if.)  What if I didn't think of bad possibilities, but only good?  Where would I be right now?  I'll tell you...

I'd be in that perfect apartment.  I'd have a much better job.  I'd be healthier in mind and body.  I wouldn't be sabotaging myself.  I'd likely even have love in my life.  

Today is my birthday.  I started out this day by sleeping in, talking on the phone with friends as I had coffee, then I baked some cinnamon rolls-- from a can in the refrigerated section, not vegan, shame on me-- and I will be having a pajama day, and watching my favorite movies.  I had wanted to go to Carmel for my 45th, but I think my what-if's derailed my dreams because here I am, definitely not in Carmel.  

Here is to a new year of possibilities.   A new year of accomplishments!  Not just being resourceful and surviving, but flourishing, thriving, and enjoying a life of abundance!  Happy Birthday to me! 




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